I have something a bit different for you today – a film review – of sorts. More like a forgotten nugget of understanding sparked by a film.
On Friday I went out for dinner and a movie with a friend. She had picked the film and I didn’t really know anything about it other than it was about a woman who thought she was a supermodel.
The film was called ‘I feel pretty’. Without giving you any spoilers, it’s about a woman who doesn’t have much confidence in how she looks. She’s obsessed with beauty videos and cosmetics and whilst trying to better herself she hits her head and wakes up thinking she is the most beautiful woman in the world. Hilarity ensues…
It was a classic heroes journey where you have hero trapped in situation, hero has responsibility / power thrust apron them, hero rises to challenge, fucks up, then puts it right and they all live happily ever after. It’s a fun, lighthearted, cheesy film which isn’t going to win any oscars, but was a thouroughly enjoyable 2 hours and the concept behind it really resonated with me. (Also, Michelle Williams like you’ve never seen her.)
I loved the way they examined how Amy Schumer’s character’s confidence changed when she had absolute belief in herself. The way she interpreted situations completely differently based on her perception of what was going on.
This is so true of life.
Reality is what you choose to think it is
This word choice. We get to decide people, how amazing is that? (yes yes, easier said than done, but it is doable!)
I recently met someone who had such a negative perception of the world. They thought that other people’s motivtions were based on messing up their life and that they were basically a perpetual victim. I’m not going to lie, I struggle to enjoy time with people like that. I understand paranoia and that is a horrible place to be, but seeing yourself as a victim is really draining. Horrible things happen to people in life – I am not diminishing that – and that’s not the kind of victim I’m talking about. It’s more those people who call successful people ‘lucky’ and then list a bunch of reasons why the world was against them otherwise they would be successful too. There’s often a whiff of burning martyr about them too… You all know the type of person I mean.
I knew pretty soon that I wouldn’t be able to spend any length of time with this person without wanting to shake them – I’m a believer in the ‘change your situation or change your attitude’ approach to challenges. I feel really sad for people who are in that hopelessness trap. It’s not a fun place to dwell. But equally, I don’t want to be dragged into it… there’s drama and blame and fear and all that nastiness there. That’s not my bag so I choose not to go there!
When taken in context of the film, it put me in mind of the Rhoal Dahl quote from The Twits.
“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. … You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”
If you believe everyone is out to get you, then that is what you will see. If you believe the universe has your back, that you can’t fail, then you see something entirely different.
That is what I loved about this movie. The way it celebrated the power of self confidence. It uses the character to illustrate that what we need is already within us. It’s a choice. We are what we think we are. We just have to find a way to access that belief and own that shit!
I will never be a super model… I always joke about how in my pictures for my crochet patterns I have two poses… the looking at the floor or looking thoughtfully into the sky… I just did some shots for my new tote range (you can get them in etsy by the way – gotta get my plug in) and I found that sunglasses are now a third option which allow me to look straight ahead! Here’s me working it!
(Oh and the seamstress pin is from The Pink Coat Club)
I don’t want to be a supermodel, the pressure to look amazing…yuk! I am comfortable in my body, though it took me a long time to get there. I think when you have been broken and get fixed you appreciate your body for what it is!! Yeah there are all sorts of scars and bits I wish were less wobbly and I hate that it it is starting to age, but that reminds me to love it whilst I can, it’s the only one I’ve got. Besides, everyone has their version of wobbly bits and scars tell a story!
So that is my aim for this week, and beyond I hope, whenever I feel myself starting to think ‘I’m not clever/confident/fit/brave/pretty/thin/rich/cool/grafting* enough’ (* delete as appropriate), I’m going to have a word with myself, think about this post and respond to that naughty brain monkey…
I AM ENOUGH
And you know what?
So are you!